This blog is based on something that just happened this evening. I actually am Janice in this story (not my real name). It sounded better in the third-person.
He sat facing her in the booth in front of her at the Taco Bell. Janice noticed his young appearance. He was more than likely a freshman at the local university. She also noticed he was taking more than his turn in the argument with his two friends. The argument centered on the premise that his girlfriend was not really a virgin due to a vibrator and therefore he was not her “first.” Only one of his two friends that had their backs to Janice had enough sense to still call her a virgin.
Janice wanted so much to open her mouth and state, as a matter of fact, that if a woman loses her hymen to a vibrator it is not the same thing as losing her virginity to the moron describing how he got angry and lost his erection when he didn’t feel the gush of blood from his “supposed to be” girlfriend. He animated the quotes with his fingers as if the pause in his voice wasn’t enough to grasp his sarcastic tone.
Apparently after jumping off her in anger and accusing her in a rant, the girl had to show him the vibrator that stole his secret desire, he continued to share to all. He became angry, accused her of no longer being a virgin and stormed out. He left her sexually frustrated.
How unfair, Janice thought.
Janice wanted so much open her mouth and share her two cents – basically that he was a moron to not finish off his sexual release and to enjoy the fact that she liked sex enough to find a toy to pleasure her when he wasn’t around. She wanted to share so much that she bit down on her taco just to find something to prevent the words from coming out and possibly from her standing on the table and singing it for all to hear like she was in a some scene from the TV show Glee.
Sure, the now sexually frustrated and probably crying girlfriend could have simply lied to him about her virginity and had been getting it on for years with his best friend (Janice smiled at that thought too). Or she could have been telling him the truth – that the vibrator broke her hymen.
What a way to lose it though. Janice contemplated the thought for a moment and then decided she was glad she lost her virginity the good old-fashioned way – in the back seat of the car that belong to the 20 year-old blonde with the damnedest green eyes she ever saw. Janice had lusted after him ever since he started working the same shift as her at the Dairy Queen.
Yeah, it was better that way she thought and then quickly said another quick prayer for not ending up pregnant like her friend Lucy who lost her virginity at 16 in a drunken stupor and ended up with twins boys with freckles and red hair just like the neighbor who moved right across the street. Losing your virginity to a guy without getting pregnant simply makes for better story telling she thought.
Janice felt sorry for the girlfriend of this moron. Here she was, probably getting ready to have a really good orgasm and he pulls out. For the sake of womanhood she wanted crawl over her own booth and in between his two friends to reach up and slap the moron.
She took another bite of her taco instead.
The vibrator doesn’t give her the same feeling as a real cock, his friend said. The only guy at the table with sense Janice thought.
“She didn’t have her hymen”, the moron shouted in sheer frustration.
“She is not a virgin like she said she was,” he continued his rant. “It isn’t the same thing. I thought she was saving herself for me. I even took time to make it a special night – I bought her fucking flowers too. And here the whole time she gave her virginity to a fucking vibrator. She couldn’t wait – that fucking slut!” He ended with a loud slurp of his drink, and the attention of everyone in the restaurant.
Everyone meant Janice and the cashier, who was at least 60. Janice smiled at the thought of the cashier describing her complaint to a cop.
“Officer these young men were talking about vibrators and virgins and I didn’t know how to stop them.”
Janice had no more taco to hold her back. She couldn’t take it anymore. She had to speak up for women everywhere who used vibrators to keep sanity – hell to simply keep world peace!
He realized her caught her attention when he saw the older woman take the napkin to both corners of her lips where there was nothing to wipe clean. She looked right at him.
He probably should apologize for his loud voice he thought. Then he quickly became angry again at the thought of apologizing to a woman who probably owned a vibrator too.
He retained his angry face and stared right back.
He blinked. He did not just see her mouth “You are a fucking idiot.” Yet, when his two friends turned around with smiles on their faces, he knew he heard what he read on her lips.
“A complete idiot,” she continued.
“You had a woman underneath you, you were ready to shoot a load and you stopped just cause you didn’t feel her hymen! You could have asked her about it after you finished!” Janice was on a roll now.
She pushed her hands on the table and leaned forward. “And you should be happy that she uses a vibrator!” she exclaimed.
“That means she actually LIKES sex you idiot. You had a girlfriend that likes sex and you stormed out on her, probably make her cry too, all because you wanted to feel some blood. What a fucking idiot!”
Then Janice smiled. She wanted to continue on about how he should be glad for vibrators but the thought hit her, “You know, she is still technically still a virgin. You didn’t come in her, so technically she is still a virgin and if the girl has any sense she is fucking your roommate or the first man she sees right about now just so she can get her release.” she continued and she got up from the booth, grabbing her purse and the food tray in the process.
“If you want a virgin go buy a blow up doll and fuck that. If you want a mind-blowing orgasm, go find a woman who likes sex enough to know how to use a vibrator to get herself off. Any girl who isn’t shy about touching herself probably isn’t shy about sucking a dick either!” She said as she stood at the front of their booth while all three were looking at her with their mouths open, probably wondering how this middle-aged woman learned to talk like that.
Feeling satisfied that she stood for what was right and wholesome; Janice stood up and walked out the door, leaving her tray for the boys to clean up.